Tuesday, July 10, 2007

All in

Remember last week when I said I was sick? Guess what came to fruition today? Are you getting the drift?

Yeah, so I'm home from class today and listening to "Blood on the Tracks" instead of a professor's voice. I should be sleeping, but I've been up emailing clubs and festivals (also, a friend at the Phoenix just told me that they may be finally ready to do a proper piece on us -- maybe a preview of July 31 with Kings of Leon? We got to talking about it this morning... quick turnaround!). More than anything, I really want this fall tour to happen. I don't know if July 7 was the catalyst. I just really want to do it. Why wouldn't I?

I was talking to my mother on the phone the other day, who has always supported music in strange ways, but never really encouraged it beyond a hobby. Yes, she and my father were there for my early training and put the tools in front of me. But when I started to get serious, she got scared. Rarely did she come to Duffer or Glenn/Jimmy shows. She started saying the same thing she told me when I wanted to play in the NBA as a young child -- don't count on it. Do school. Do work. Music is nothing more than fun.

Since Cassavettes started, she's been supportive at various levels (she did lend us a substantial amount of money after I ran out while financing "It's Gonna Change" -- she has since been repaid) and slowly been more comfortable with me trying this as a full-time gig (always after gradution, I promised). Well, we've been talking about jobs a lot lately, because I'm right there on the cusp of that post-grad panic. I've had a couple offers and ideas, but none seem to fit into the fabric of playing with the band. In comes some Motherly advice:

"What are you concerned about? Because I think you're worried about money, but want to play music." (NOTE: I'm not really worried about the money, there are just varying degrees of offers, some WAY better than expected)
"Yeah, those two don't exactly add up, do they?"
"I've been thinking you should just take the next year or couple years, and ride this thing to see where it goes."

WHAT? That's the first time those words have left her lips. I've always said I should do this while we're still young or I'll end up regretting it later, but that was always a lonesome sentiment. I want to live when I'm young -- I know that it would be too easy for me to fall into the straight-laced, buttoned-down working life. I like work. I like hard work and seeing something blossom, and I don't like being behind -- all good reasons to take what I can now. But I also don't want to end up being over 50 and regretting giving all my youth to work and no play. This way I can do both. And if I can get a job that pays for some of that, even better. I can balance a whole hell of a lot, it's my blessing to make up for being given such a crappy memory.

Anyway, I'm all in. I love music. I love the band. I want to make it happen. To prove this, you see, I don't take sick days from Cassavettes.



Anonymous Anonymous said...



18 July, 2007 08:37  
Anonymous glenn said...

that shot of chris throwing balloons and streamers is so super swizz.

23 July, 2007 08:12  

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